mother and daughter exchange.

brother dearest nudged me out of dreamland and into the semi-darkness of my room. our mom was on the phone at 5:15 AM. groggy and slight nauseated from lack of sleep, i went down the stairs to have a chat with mom.

she was asking how i was and how were my plans going along. blah. blah. blah.

but of course, our phone conversations can never be complete without THE question.

"o, ano may boyfriend ka na ba?"

this is usually answered by a "no," then mom would ramble on, "huwag muna, bata ka pa. enjoy ka muna sa pagka-single." there are variations though.

but this time, with just 5 hours sleep, my mouth is faster than my brain. i answered...

"wala pa. ikaw meron na? huwag muna."

natawa na lang kaming dalawa. i didn't even know i said that until i said that.

giving up forever

one of my seminarian friends asked me if i would do what seth did in "city of angels," giving up immortality to be able to spend even just a little time with the one he loves.

i asked him back the same question.

he answered yes. just to have that precious moment with the one he loves.

he asked me again.

sadly, i answered no.

IRIS

And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

being loved by someone is never really enough.

star cinema has been coming up with pretty good films lately. though they still occasionally succumb to some filipino film making pitfalls (the lead girl always has to have a best friend, song and dance numbers, continuity, etc.), they have learned to experiment with different types of approaches to common themes. thus coming up with better films tackling the same old stories yet with a fresh approach. at the same time, they have learned to dig deeper into human interest issues without necessarily having to make it glaring and obvious.

even in editing their scenes, they have learned to exploit the wonders of technology. scenes are faster and less dragging. they have learned to merge scenes without having to destroy the momentum of thought.

anyway, just to note, the last four movies i have scene were all from star cinema. "bagong buwan," "american adobo," "kung ika'y isang panaginip," and "got to believe." and these movies attracted be not because of the stars (i'm a closet sharon cuneta fan so only she can do that to me). BB and AA got me interested because there was an attempt to explore new topics. G2B and KIIP had humorous trailers. none of them disappointed me. :)

next time, i get interested in a star cinema flick, i'll try to make my way and watch it. Filipinos need all the support they can from other Filipinos.

kahit ilang ulit pang marinig, patuloy na kumukurot sa puso...

KANLUNGAN
Performed by Noel Cabangon of Buklod

pana-panahon ang pagkakataon
maibabalik ba ang kahapon?

natatandaan mo pa ba,
nang tayong dalwa ang unang nagkita?
panahon ng kamusmusan
sa piling ng mga bulaklak at halaman
doon tayong nagsimulang
mangarap at tumula

natatandaan mo pa ba,
inukit kong puso sa punong mangga
at ang inalay kong gumamela
magkahawak-kamay sa dalampasigan
malayang tulad ng mga ibon
ang gunita ng ating kahapon

ang mga puno't halaman
ay kabiyak ng ating gunita
sa paglipas ng panahon bakit kailangan ding lumisan?

pana-panahon ang pagkakatao
maibabalik ba ang kahapon?

ngayon ikaw ay nagbalik
at tulad ko rin ang iyong pananabik
makita ang dating kanlungan
tahanan ng ating tula at pangarap
ngayon ay naglaho na
saan hahanapin pa?

lumilipas ang panahon
kabiyak ng ating gunita
ang mga puno't halaman
bakit kailangan lumisan?

pana-panahon ang pagkakataon
maibabalik ba ang kahapon?

lumilipas ang panahon
kabiyak ng ating gunita
ang mga puno't halaman
bakit kailangan lumisa?

pana-panahon ang pagkakataon
maibabalik ba ang kahapon?

SECRET GARDEN
by Bruce Springsteen

She'll let you in her house
If you come knockin' late at night
She'll let you in her mouth
If the words you say are right
If you pay the price
She'll let you deep inside
But there's a secret garden she hides

She'll let you in her car
To go drivin' round
She'll let you into the parts of herself
That'll bring you down
She'll let you in her heart
If you got a hammer and a vise
But into her secret garden, don't think twice

You've gone a million miles
How far'd you get
To that place where you can't remember
And you can't forget

She'll lead you down a path
There'll be tenderness in the air
She'll let you come just far enough
So you know she's really there
She'll look at you and smile
And her eyes will say
She's got a secret garden
Where everything you want
Where everything you need
Will always stay
A million miles away

this song always pulls a heartstring...

kahapon, nanduon kami ni MM sa 70's Bistro para pakinggan si Noel Cabangon. at para na rin sa unti-unting pamamaalam. paalis na kasi siya sa katapusan ng buwan para mag-aral ng dalawang taon sa Sophia University sa Japan.

nakakatuwang alalahanin ang mga kalokohan namin noong aming JVP year habang nakatira kami sa kanya-kanyang bundok sa bukidnon. lahat ng ito habang nakikinig sa malamig na boses ni Noel C. siyempre lalo pang nag-alab ang aming mga puso noong inawit na niya ang "Lea" at "Kanlungan".

nanduon din si TQ na minsan-minsan nakikiupo sa amin. lalo tuloy nanariwa kung gaano kami ka-cowboy (bagamat sila ay mga true-blue dalaga) noong mga taong iyon. pati pagsakay sa truck ng kalabasa (para kay TQ) at pagsampa sa truck ng tubohan (para sa akin). si MM naman, kahit hindi natutuwa sa milya-milya na lakarin para makaabot sa ilog ng Pulangi, nakakaya pa rin naman.

nagpaplano na rin kami ni TQ para sa aming cowboy vacation sa mindoro bandang katapusan ng taon. hindi na ako makapaghintay! paano ay pagtatapos na rin ng mga kaibigan kong mga seminarista. :)

masaya ang gabi. kakaunti lang ang nagyoyosi, nakakapagpalipad ng kaluluwa ang tinig ni noel, kuwentuhan ng mga klasiks... nakasira lang ang julia clarete na kontrabida ni juday dahil nagpapansin para pakantahin sa stage. pumayag naman ang noel. sus! kawawang "time after time" na isa sa mga paborito ko pa namang awit.

mabuti na lang at cute si bayang barrios. (huh? hehehe!)

Take the "How immature are you?" Test

created by sami


eh? if being mature is not acting like a lunatic then i guess i can take this.

yesterday night smelled like the scent of new and good things coming.

it's as as if God was concocting a brew of inspiration and truths,
of faith and hope,
of challenges and opportunities,
of miracles and marvels...

yo, solace! thanks for these. :)

What's Your Style? Find out @ She's Crafty


Which Buffy Girl Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty


Which My So-Called Life Character Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty


Would you survive a horror movie? Find out @ She's Crafty


Which Action Star Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty


Which Empire Records Character Are You? Find out @ She's Crafty


Who's Your 80s Movie Icon Alter-Ego? Find out @ She's Crafty


Who's Your Inner Buffy Bad-Girl? Find out @ She's Crafty


Who's Your Inner Music Industry Diva? Find out @ She's Crafty

hmm... contradicting ideas. yup, that's me. i guess. hmmm...

signs.

traveling in the past four years have allowed me to witness Filipino wit when it comes to signs.

tagline of a pig feeds product in Batangas:
"ang serbis na mabilis makabuntis."

seen somewhere in Davao City:
Harry Cutter Barber Shop

sign board of a funeral parlor:
Fun. Dimayacyac Day and Night Service

somewhere in Bukidnon:
Funeraria Mabuhay

tagline of a signboard business near Ateneo de Naga:
A business with no sign is a sign of monkey business

* * * * *

and here are common sights you can see most anywhere in the Philippines: (other than McDo, Jollibee and the like)

Natasha accessories.
Not only can does she have several branches in our key cities, even in kaloob-loobang Bukidnon, you can find her.

Big Mak!
It's even used from time to time in the "Tabing Ilog" series.

Julie's Bakeshop.
She has been a constant companion of JVPs especially when the budget for a meal is only ten pesos.

Park 'N Go Bakeshop.
Most stopovers and terminals have Park 'N Go though their bread does not taste as yummy as Julie's

Pao D' Arco.
After four years, it remains a mystery to me what it is. But the signs are mostly located near ricefields so it might be a certain type of pesticide or fertilizer.

Factory Depot.
It has gone beyond Quiapo and Paco. Most growing municipalities have this store somewhere along the highway.

rest.

it felt like a family vacation.

armed with overflowing groceries, pre-cooked adobo, dusting swim wear, long unread books, harry potter games, a variety of CDs and tapes (from Gipsy Kings to 70's Filipino swing music), the whole office rode off for a weekend getaway to San Juan, Batangas.

the only rule we imposed: walang pilitan.

* * * * *

the winds were strong and waves much stronger, but both helped soothe and calm the soul. even as they clashed against each other, both helped in drawing the tension and stress people have been feeling the past few days.

most of us had our legs up the table munching on salty junk food, reading books that have been dusting on our headboards for quite some time already. finally. a chance to just bum on our butts!

* * * * *
the weekend was not really exciting. not the typical adventurist trips that i have grown accustomed to. but it was exactly what i wanted it to be. serene. tranquil. with the sounds of nature sweetly serenading each of us. each of us hearing a different song.

* * * * *
i pray for another chance like that.

thanks for ML for being so persistent that we push through with this trip.

eh? what's this?